Women @ Work Newsletter - Purpose & Priorities Produce Balance

January, 2011
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Greetings!
This newsletter honors the contribution made by women daily through both their paid and unpaid work. Help celebrate Women's Work by forwarding it to women you know.
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Your Career:
You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you
if you realized how seldom they do.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt
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Purpose & Priorities Produce Balance

A friend contacted me recently asking if I had a one-page handout on work-life balance that she could give to her staff. Her request is the impetus for this month's newsletter.

My first reaction whenever I hear work-life balance is slight trepidation. As a
stand alone goal, it can just add to the guilt women are already experiencing in
relation to their "work" lives. While they are madly trying to keep everything
copasetic, their inner critic starts harping at them for not being more "balanced."

The illusion that life can be balanced is just that - an illusion. I propose that
a reasonable feeling of balance or harmony, will consistently be produced when we
become intentional about living on purpose and stay true to our priorities.

The importance of knowing your life purpose is bandied about a lot these days -
especially in the coaching world. It can feel a bit overbearing but it doesn't need
to. Being clear about your life purpose is like having an inner compass. We can
take a look at it whenever we feel lost or overwhelmed. We can use it as a checkpoint,
by asking ourselves "How does this fit with my purpose?" or "What is the role of
this activity in my life right now?"

Knowing the greater purpose you hold for your life helps define why you are doing
something, particularly when it comes to taking on large projects or goals. To create
the life we want, it's advisable to be aware of why we are spending our energy on
something. This is not to justify our actions, but rather to be more intentional
about them. Living with purpose will bring you more ease. Choices will become
more clear. Decisions will be made with less effort. With that will come a more
balanced feeling.

There are many great exercises to help you create your personal life purpose statement.
Stephen Covey calls it creating your mission statement. In his book The 7 Habits
of Highly Successful People, he suggests imagining you are attending your own funeral.
Four speakers, each from a different dimension of your life - family, vocation,
community, friends - describe their experience of knowing you. What would you want
them to say about you? He invites you to reflect on the essence of their messages
to formulate your mission statement.

Marcia Bench, in her book Career Coaching: An Insider's Guide, suggests a process
of reflective questions to lead to writing your life purpose statement, such as
"What do you love to do in your spare time?" "What cause inspires you to action?"
or "What things would your life be incomplete without?" She calls the first half
of your life purpose statement the "essence" and suggests that this part stays
relatively unchanged over your lifetime. An example is "to be a healer in the world."
The second part of the statement which she calls the "expression" of your purpose,
is how you express your essence. She also says that the "expression" of your life
purpose may change as your life circumstances change. Using her concept, an example
purpose statement may read "My life's purpose is to help women find their power
(essence) through supporting their discovery of an authentic vocation (expression).

In the above example, it would seem plausible that if the way I express the essence
of my purpose needs to change based on my life circumstances, and when that change
is driven by my priorities at that particular life stage, then ideally, this should
contribute to me living in harmony or feeling more balanced about my life.You can
go to publications on this website and scroll down to click on the Life Purpose to download a pdf file containing an exercise designed to help you create your Life
Purpose statement using this same method.

A priority is something to which we pay special attention. Our priorities change
as we move through various life cycle stages. My priorities in my 20's, single
and no dependents, were very different from when I was in my 40's, raising two teenage
sons plus chasing success in the corporate world. At this stage of my life neither
of those priorities exist.

In a priority-defining exercise go to the Publications tab on this website and scroll down to the Priorities handout in which you can identify your most important priorities under six life dimensions: 1) Family
/ Relational, 2) Vocational, 3) Physical, 4) Mental / Emotional, 5) Social / Recreational,
and 6) Spiritual. This exercise may be a good precursor to the one designed to create
your Life Purpose statement. It's also the kind of tool you can revisit on a regular
basis to keep you on track for that balanced feeling.

The point of these exercises is not a make-work project; goodness knows none of
us need anything more to do! It is, however, a powerful way to start off your year
with:

* FOCUS in your life (knowing what you want and why you're doing things),
* Excellent BOUNDARIES (saying "NO" to things that don't fit your priorities),
* Demonstrated COMPETENCY (modeling the kind of behavior that shows you are in charge
of your life),
* Greater BALANCE (the best formula for feeling balanced is living on purpose and
being true to your priorities).

I wish you the most "balanced" year ever in 2011!

Kathleen
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Kathleen Johnston | 1106 Twin Brooks Point NW | Edmonton | Alberta | T6J 7G5 | Canada